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I havn't been on livejournal in so long this is crazy.....I lost my password and then the email i used got cancelled so i reinstated it and shit....But anyway i dont even know if anyone is going to read this but lets see in the last year shits been wild!....I got a taste of the real world when my mom kicked me out....I lived in philly and up here then back in philly i was all over the place but now im back with my mom who is crazy by the way and im working at wawa full time and about to get another part time job....I have the best boyfriend like EVER ....Daniel hes fuckin great!!!....I no longer have a car i crashed that im tryin to get a new one if anyone knows any cars for sale hook me up hahahaha but yea i gotta go do my chores and then me and daniel are having an US day lol cuz i have been working like craZy
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Saturday, September 24th, 2005
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blah blah blah said the rabbit
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| Time: | 12:45 am. |
| Mood: |  happy. | | Music: | Beautiful Soul- Jesse McCartney. |
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I had the first really fun day in a long time today with Becky and Sean...Thanks guys...I went shopping and just had so much fun it makes me feel really comfortable that i know ill have friends when i go back to shanahan and in the year ive been gone my friends have stuck by me I love you guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!...Thanks for a great time Becky and Sean......Becky we need to find that midgetville in WC...We have to go on a mission.....And i approve of brandon he meets your standards
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| Time: | 10:57 am. |
| Mood: |  anxious. | | Music: | Dope- You spin me right round. |
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So im sitting here at home....It's Friday and everyone is at school including my mother who is teaching some of my friends at this exact moment....Odd to think that im not there...Im really nervous about coming home...I mean i want to but im going to miss all the people who have helped me throughout this whole year in placement...And i dont know what im going to do without them....Such as:
My social worker Heather- I hated her at first i though that she was against along with everyone and was going to never let me go but once i got over my self and actually tried to help myself get better...She actually heard my opinions and listened to what i had to say...My mom told me that when i was doing really bad and was in and out of the hospital they were tlaking about my discharge being after i turn 18...Then i changed...She origionally was going to discharge me in June after school ended and that would have meant i would have missed my entire senior year but i talked to her and expressed my concerns like missing the senior prom and not being able to graduate and repeat senior year...She listened to me and decided that it would be good to discharge me in the last week of the third quarter....She is also like my secret decoder ring between my mother and I...For example when my mom thinks that im acting like a 14 yr old because i leave things to the last minate and i dont like doing homework Heather reassures her im a normal teen...And Heather explains the things my mom really means compared to the things she says....I will greatly miss Heather
My individual counselor Chris(aka Tofie)- My origional IC was Jay who was like my father figure a few months right as i was beginning to do really bad he left which made me feel even worse but i still love him....Chris was new IC i had already built a relationship with him so i was already comfortable...He always talked to me whenever i needed to... When i was doing bad he was always with me talking to me and trying to reassure me that things were going to be alright(which i didn't believe)...He spent hours and hours with me even when i was yelling and screaming at him to fuckoff and telling him i hated him...I got mad at him once for something stupid and i was talking to my staff Jackie and she said "what's wrong with you Martha?..Chris spends more time with you than any IC spends with their individual!"...Chris was there when i was crying trying to help me and even when i was being an asshole...Tofie is like my big brother... :'(
Sarah, My best friend at Kidspeace- The first time i met Sarah was in the hospital back in October...Even though she was only there one day when i left we had a connection...I thought i was never going to see her again since she was in a different residential...But while i was in the hospital again in Novemeber-December little did i know she got transferred to my unit...When i came back we didn't talk all that much but suddenly we just started hanging out all the time...We get into trouble alot but its all in fun...She is the funniest person and she always has me rolling...For example yesterday in school she just randomly started saying the word fuck over and over again...My teacher was like sarah stop using foul language and she says are you trying to stop me from freedom of speech of saying my favorite word fuck and he said im going to hold you after detention and she said what do you think by keeping me after school your going change my favorite word from being fuck and she just kept going....I could not stop laughing...I love that girl and that's the girl im going to miss the most on my unit...But when she gets out we're are definatly going to hang out for sure...Hopefully some of my friends can meet her......
All in all Im going to miss all the people i have met...My staff have always been there for me along with my friends..Im not going to miss the place im going to miss the people...But im excited to actually have freedom...Okay let me stop boring you
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Saturday, March 12th, 2005
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| Time: | 4:15 pm. |
| Music: | adidas-Korn. |
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Im coming home for good April 4 im so excited i get to go back to school and graduate woohoo
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Friday, February 18th, 2005
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| Time: | 8:32 pm. |
| Mood: | ecstatic. | | Music: | Boulavard of broken dreams- Green Day. |
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Im coming home for good in a month and a half and i come home every wkend wooohooo so call me
You are PUNK! U like being around those who are
really close to u. You get depressed most times
but you just wanna live!You have alot of
feelings and thoughts inside that you keep to
yourself! sometimes you dont know who to trust.
You have friends that believe in you and know the
real you, which means the most.
Thanks, please rate
Are you GOTHIC, PREP, PUNK,UNIQUE (girls only)
brought to you by Quizilla
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Monday, January 3rd, 2005
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| Time: | 9:12 am. |
| Mood: |  aggravated. |
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I got back to computer class because i got my shoes back after 4 months of wearing slippers....I ran from my placement and was gone for 2 days but im back i got to go off-grounds for the first time since September and Talia came up to see me which i was very happy about and we saw the movie Darkness it's a foreign film and it was really freaky but the ending was really weird but i liked it...im still having porblems here and there but i made it through X-mas without running or getting hospitalized so i was proud of myself...i might have to repeat senior year because i cant graduate without my religion credits which im really angry about so i either have to repeat a year at shanahan and graduate with the class of 2006 or go to a 5th year alternative high school so that's all for today
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Monday, November 8th, 2004
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| Time: | 9:20 am. |
| Mood: |  stressed. |
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Im doing horrible i went up to the hospital for a 2nd time and im back down....i get angry so easily i dunno whats wrong with me erg....my meds piss me off im having side effects from them dayum meds...i AWOLed and my old individual Jay had to come get me bc i wouldnt come out of the woods....I miss my dad :'(
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Monday, October 11th, 2004
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| Subject: | ERG!! |
| Time: | 6:23 am. |
| Mood: | frustrated. | | Music: | Still frame- Trapt. |
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I dont think Im coming home for good in november all this stuff happened and I went craZy Im really struggling right now and it sucks but im trying my best to keep my head up and work through this but im in a rut right now but im really trying it's frustarating though...Ill hopefully be starting my homepasses again soon....My social worker said i can start my homepasses again when i can keep myself "safe" so im trying wish me luck thanks for all the support i love you guys!!!
^^^^This is how i feel^^^^
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Sunday, September 12th, 2004
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| Time: | 8:37 am. |
| Mood: |  awake. |
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Well I think im coming home in the beginning of November!!!...Im really excited....The people who know me know what im talking about!!!
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Thursday, April 29th, 2004
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I can forsee that today is going to be a boring day....Im a bit hungover and im feeling nauseous ...Dayum myself to hell for drinking on a school night!!...Well Talia slept over last night as usual hehe and she said that last night i was trying to hook up with her hahaha...i Get really horny when im drunk haha...Well after i got off the phone with Evan last night i fell to the ground and couldnt get up it was.....DRUNKNESS....
Becky came over yesterday and we played basketball with my little brother and then i walked her to her sister's house her sister wasn't home yet so i decided to help myself to a big swig of jack daniels it was fun...
Im in a very somber/tired mood it is quite odd...I skipped 3rd period today i mean i was already late so there was pretty much no point in me going...I got to see SEAN AND MARY BETH....Woot woot...Sean is so hilarious i love him....
Im in 4th period at the present moment in time and catwoman is being a BITCH!!....
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Tuesday, April 27th, 2004
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| Time: | 11:24 am. |
| Mood: | ecstatic. | | Music: | roses- outkast. |
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You know im going to be gone in a few weeks and you know what?..*gets excited* IM GOING TO LIVE IT UP!!!!!...So fuck the rules fuck my probation officer fuck authority in general im gunna party it up for the next 2 weeks before i leave so peace out puppy whooo hoooo
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| Time: | 11:29 am. |
| Mood: |  giddy. | | Music: | Cocachi - Richochet. |
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Here i am sitting in computer class with ERIN!!!....I can barely type with my nails ahhh it's frustarating....Both me and Erin's computers were going crazy today all of a sudden mine would go from normal typing to caps then back to normal it was crazy
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Well I was supposed to me be grounded which for the most part I was EXCEPT for...
Friday when i went to a fair with Danielle...My mom and brother were going and I invited Danielle to go but she said that she thought her dad was going to say no so i stayed home and my mom armed the security system to lock me in but then Danielle called and was like IM AT THE FAIR im coming to get you but i was like how am i supposed to get outta the house(well i can go out the window that i broke so i could sneak out) but my mom would kill me well my mom told me i could go out the window hahaha so that's what i did Friday night
Saturday Talia came over and we cleaned my mom's car and vacuumed it and such...Then Talia gets a call from Kate(she left her wallet in Talia's car) she needed her wallet....So she tells us to meet her at Villa Nova University(completly out of Talia's way) but Talia says ok watever....so my mom lemme go with her and then all of a sudden Talia realizes she missed the exit and she said we might as well go back to her townhouse(we also had trixie with us<---Awwww your cute)...So we go back and go inside and bring trixie then Kate came in and Trixie went running down the stairs barkin at her.....Kate just stands there in utter shock and the first things that come out of her mouth are..."She has a vagina....It looks like lips...She's really loose!".....Kate is sooooo fucking hilarious i love her!!!! so we got home around 9 and by that time i was so tired so i went to bed after watching Law & Order SVU<---Best Show!
Sunday me and Talia woke up at 9 and went to Wawa got stuff came back got dressed for church then me and Talia went out to start my mom's car and the battery was dead thank God Talia was there bc my dads car battery was dead too so yea that was pretty much my day haha
Me with my nose pierced(really bad picture though)
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Wednesday, April 21st, 2004
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So I'm walking down the hallway with Sean and he says to me out of nowhere "Does your vagina ever itch?"....I was like WHAT!? And he says "You know how guys always itch their balls is it the same with girls..." I was like uh i dont know haha...Sean I Love You
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Tuesday, April 20th, 2004
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So i got my nose pierced hehehe i will have a picture soon i just have to get batteries for my digital camera....uh yea random picture time....
Well hope you enjoyed my pictures hehe
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Well im sitting here doing the whole photobucket thing that Sean told me to do(<--Thank you Sean!) and this picture was up on the screen....
And then Catwoman saw it....How great is that!.....I should have said, "That's just for you!"...And then she saw this one too
...Well i skipped third period again with Sean thank God Mrs. Meyer wasn't here today because I think she told my mom that she saw me in lunch..Eek!...It turns out i failed math with a 64 for the quarter my mom was poppin at me in homeroom but it will blow over....
I get my nose pierced today my moms bringing me after school and im so excited but oh so scared hehe wish me luck....I was supposed to hang out with <3Evan<3 tonight but of course my mom won't let me do anything...WTF i never get to see him it's really sad:-(....I also wanted to hang out with Sean, Huff, Foof and the rest of the gang on Saturday but of course my mom won't let me because she caught me smoking pot and drinking erg isn't it enough that she's sending me away? SO not fair...
My aunt and uncle from Florida are flying in today i can't wait to see the look on my aunt's face when she sees my nose ring Boo Yah BITCH!!!!!
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Wednesday, March 31st, 2004
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| Subject: | ugh |
| Time: | 10:53 am. |
| Mood: |  blank. | | Music: | Britney Spears. |
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Actually i dont feel like writing an entry but here's a summary of what i have to say
Im pretty positive im being sent away for 6 months
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marthy69's journal
okay.